The house was taken over by the mortgage holder, my mother-in-law died, my wife and father-in-law became ill. Then I got a promising business opportunity. Why cant he stay on the water wagon? Save for a few brief moments of temptation the thought of drink has never returned; and at such times a great revulsion has risen up in him. Jerry needed to know so he started upon a project to identify the changes that were made to various printings and editions of the Big Book. We suggest you do this as we have done it in the chapter on alcoholism. Many a distracted wife has visited this house to find loving and understanding companionship among women who knew her problem, to hear from the lips of their husbands what had happened to them, to be advised how her own wayward mate might be hospitalized and approached when next he stumbled. This is perhaps difficult-especially discussing our defects with another person. We think that such a view is self-centered and in direct conflict with the new way of living. At least, so the chemist said. He sometimes drinks in the morning and through the day also, to hold his nervousness in check. Our next thought is that you should never tell him what he must do about his drinking. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. Perhaps we rejected this particular conception because it seemed inadequate. Whenever you want to, you control your drinking. It didnt work. They cited cases out of their own experience by the dozen. Some of you are thinking: Yes, what you tell us is true, but it doesnt fully apply. Jericho Season 3: Civil War is a comic book limited series of six issues that continues the storyline of the CBS television show Jericho. He is not likely to get far in any direction if he fails to show unselfishness and love under his own roof. Why, he argued, should he lose the remainder of his business, only to bring still more suffering to his family by foolishly admitting his plight to people from whom he made his livelihood? An alcoholic of this temperament may be quick to use this chapter as a club over your head. You say, Yes, Im willing. Before taking drastic action which might implicate other people we secure their consent. He may be an example of the truth that faith alone is insufficient. Nearly all have recovered. It was fortunate, for my old business associates remained skeptical for a year and a half, during which I found little work. The most incompatible people discover they have a basis upon which they can meet. With these we have had experience galore. Here is a brief account: Years ago, in 1935, one of our number made a journey to a certain western city. No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Sub-sede: Rua Prudente de Moraes, 911 We asked ourselves why we were angry. Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity? Where had been my high resolve? It should continue for our lifetime. We think this person is in danger. Business and professional men have regained their standing. The family is mystified. Somehow I managed to drag my mattress to a lower floor, lest I suddenly leap. PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. Stocks were at the low point of 1932, and I had somehow formed a group to buy. Yet we had been seeing another kind of flight, a spiritual liberation from this world, people who rose above their problems. He knows the alcoholic as the employer sees him. She would soon have to give me over to the undertaker or the asylum. We are assuming, of course, that the reader desires to stop. These are followed by forty-three personal experiences. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. Then comes a baker's dozen personal stories, and the apparent miraculous relief that certain problem drinkers have experienced, armed only with the hope that there just might be another way to live without having to fight constantly with . Quicksand stretched around me in all directions. Usually we did not leave. You can use any of our indexes with either edition. Whatever the method, its object is to thoroughly clear mind and body of the effects of alcohol. We have to! In most cases it was found that our self-esteem, our pocketbooks, our ambitions, our personal relationships (including sex) were hurt or threatened. But why shouldnt we laugh? There are exceptions. Our homes have been battle-grounds many an evening. Preface / Forward to the 1st Edition. Our experience shows that you need not be disconcerted. It also varies if you include words and phrases such as "Requires", "Had to", "Imperative . This means a new attitude and spirit all around. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. Have there been any significant changes in the first 164 pages? Suppose an approach is made something like this: State that you know about his drinking, and that it must stop. If you do this thoroughly, few people will ask you to drink. Nothing would please us so much as to write a book which would contain no basis for contention or argument. This requires action on our part, which, when completed, will mean that we have admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being, the exact nature of our defects. Common sense would thus become uncommon sense. He stood in the Presence of Infinite Power and Love. Opinions vary considerably as to why the alcoholic reacts differently from normal people. Paragraph numbers along side the text for easy reference. We think of their needs and work for them. Upon a foundation of complete willingness I might build what I saw in my friend. He and his wife would leave elated by the thought of what they could now do for some stricken acquaintance and his family. Out came his carpet slippers and a bottle. Is it right to let him ruin your life and the lives of your children? Are these extravagant promises? The problems of the community might engage attention. But the moment I made up my mind to go through with the process, I had the curious feeling that my alcoholic condition was relieved, as in fact it proved to be. I rather appreciated your ideas about the subtle insanity which precedes the first drink, but I was confident it could not happen to me after what I had learned. The family must realize that dad, though marvelously improved, is still convalescing. Little clusters of twos and threes and fives of us have sprung up in other communities, through contact with our two larger centers. They will always materialize if we work for them. Do not set your heart on reforming your husband. In many homes this is a difficult thing to do, but it must be done if any results are to be expected. You will be bound to them with new and wonderful ties, for you will escape disaster together and you will commence shoulder to shoulder your common journey. Where were we at fault, what should we have done instead? Tell him you have been worried, though perhaps needlessly. His friends feel closer over a highball. I reasoned I was not so far advanced as most of you fellows, that I had been usually successful in licking my other personal problems, and that I would therefore be successful where you men failed. We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better. The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Never avoid these responsibilities, but be sure you are doing the right thing if you assume them. Because this book has become the basic text for our Society 5-b. What a state of mental goose-flesh that used to bring on! Our former enemies sometimes praise what we are doing and wish us well. Many of us felt that we had plenty of character. My writhing nerves were stilled at last. Here was something at work in a human heart which had done the impossible. Because this book has become the basic text for our Society 5-b. Big Book, page 164. Be satisfied he is not deceiving himself or you. And we, who have imposed on the best of employers, can scarcely blame them if they have been short with us. We do not want to be the arbiter of anyones sex conduct. God will determine that, so you must remember that your real reliance is always upon Him. How is that to come about? you ask. If you ask him why he started on that last bender, the chances are he will offer you any one of a hundred alibis. The free version features the full text of the Big Book, prayers, personal stories, podcasts, meeting finder, and more! Big Book Online (PDF) of Alcoholics Anonymous. Words contained within the first 164 pages of the Big Book. The best way to get in touch with Alcoholics Anonymous is through your local telephone book by simply looking up Alcoholics Anonymous in the White Pages. We believe and hope it contains all you will need to begin. Is he not unconsciously trying to see what he can take from the family life rather than give? Let him draw his own conclusion. Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. His action met wide-spread approval, and today he is one of the most trusted citizens of his town. We found, too, that we had been worshippers. He is a real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Starting from a speck on the domestic horizon, great thunderclouds of dispute may gather. He soon indicated he was anxious to see us. We shouldnt be shy on this matter of prayer. Many times we talk to a new man and watch his hope rise as we discuss his alcoholic problems and explain our fellowship. It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. Tell him enough about your drinking habits, symptoms, and experiences to encourage him to speak of himself. Let him ask you that question, if he will. If ever there was a successful business man, it is Fred. Perhaps your husband has been living in that strange world of alcoholism where everything is distorted and exaggerated. Nevertheless, the twentieth century readily accepts theories of all kinds, provided they are firmly grounded in fact. By every form of self-deception and experimentation, they will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule, therefore nonalcoholic. A good soldier is neer forgot The barriers he had built through the years were swept away. That being so you have swallowed and digested some big chunks of truth about yourself. Their cost of production is figured to a fine decimal point. Each might pray about it, having the other ones happiness uppermost in mind. How to Use Our Book Page Count Calculator. I saw that will power and self-knowledge would not help in those strange mental blank spots. Edition/Shrine Big Twin motorcycle . Telling them what we are trying to do, we make no bones about our drinking; they usually know it anyway, whether we think so or not. 99 DC Superhero Girls Deluxe Harley Quinn Costume 49. I use Book Antiqua 11 for regular books, and 16 points for large print. Cleaning up old scrapes, helping to settle family differences, explaining the disinherited son to his irate parents, lending money and securing jobs for each other, when justified-these are everyday occurrences. But if you cannot or will not stop drinking, I think you ought to resign.. I was part of life at last, and in the midst of the excitement I discovered liquor. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. Perhaps we are mixed up with women in a fashion we wouldnt care to have advertised. I vaguely sensed I was not being any too smart, but felt reassured as I was taking the whiskey on a full stomach. If there be divorce or separation, there should be no undue haste for the couple to get together. They can urge action without arousing hostility. Experience has taught us that these are matters about which, for our purpose, we need not be worried. They may be jealous of a God who has stolen dads affections. The proceeding was shot through with much hard feeling and controversy. Gradually things got worse. My brain raced uncontrollably and there was a terrible sense of impending calamity. He came through an acquaintance who had heard the good news. We have spent thousands of dollars for examinations. We have enjoyed such evenings ourselves; we had a good time. Next day they would be themselves again and we would forgive and try to forget. This is the Great Fact for us." Down the lobby a door opened into an attractive bar. Had not all efforts at flight failed before? Yet all reasons for not drinking were easily pushed aside in favor of the foolish idea that he could take whiskey if only he mixed it with milk! Who of us had not loved something or somebody? Then you will know what it means to give of yourself that others may survive and rediscover life. We have been driven to maudlin sympathy, to bitter resentment. Most alcoholics have to be pretty badly mangled before they really commence to solve their problems. Another time you may have to send for the police or an ambulance. You may spoil your chance of being helpful if you do. He should realize that we are engaged upon a life-and-death errand. He may wish to do a lot for other alcoholics and something of the sort may come up during business hours. Two of the members of Alcoholics Anonymous came to see me. As we look over the list of business acquaintances and friends we have hurt, we may feel diffident about going to some of them on a spiritual basis. Big Book Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book This is the year that the first woman joined AA. Sometimes you will have to call a doctor and administer sedatives under his direction. Stress the spiritual feature freely. We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, just as much as the feeling we have for a friend. For when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. We represent no particular faith or denomination. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. document.getElementById( "ak_js_2" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); PHP with Housing for Health Professionals, Substance Abuse Treatment Programs for Professionals, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy Program in Florida, Addiction Treatment Programs for Professionals, Mental Health and Addiction Treatment Programs for Professionals, Depression Treatment Center for Professionals, Rehab 101: Self-Will Run Riot How Learning to Let Go of Control Can Help Us Recover, How a 12 Step Program Helps Recovery From Addiction, Rehab 101: The Importance of Practicing New Behaviors (and Attitudes) in Recovery, Rehab 101: Some Reflections on How the Principle of Humility Fits into Recovery. For example, consider the passage: "Common words are needed to keep the book to a reasonable size and an affordable cost. It is open, we believe, to all men. Im sorry I got disturbed. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Many of the old problems will still be with you. We doubt if many of them can do it, because none will really want to stop, and hardly one of them, because of the peculiar mental twist already acquired, will find he can win out. After doing that, he must decide for himself whether he wants to go on. We have seldom told them the whole truth nor have we followed their advice. As soon as we admitted the possible existence of a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps. Sometimes these excuses have a certain plausibility, but none of them really makes sense in the light of the havoc an alcoholics drinking bout creates. WHOSE BOOK IS THIS? Do not hesitate to take your health problems to such persons. And so it had been ever since. 4.61. Aside from fellowship and sociability, the prime object was to provide a time and place where new people might bring their problems. Many of Alcoholics Anonymous were like that. He was sober. BoardPrep Recovery is an excellent option for people who may already be familiar with 12-step recovery but who may also need professional support. When father takes this tack, the family may react unfavorably. For a time he may try to hug the new treasure to himself. In another case, an alcoholic was sent to a hospital for treatment. There is another paralyzing fear. Our fears fall from us. I dare to disagree with the words of Bill Wilson. As we say among ourselves, He wants to want to stop.. We hope this book has answered some of them. If a repetition is to be prevented, place the problem, along with everything else, in Gods hands. For most alcoholics who are drinking, or who are just getting over a spree, a certain amount of physical treatment is desirable, even imperative. Our human resources, as marshalled by the will, were not sufficient; they failed utterly. Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us. Perhaps at this point we got a divorce and took the children home to father and mother. Just put in the word or phrase and you can even check to have just the 164 pages. Some of the promises are directly associated with completion of a step. In the doctors judgment he was utterly hopeless; he could never regain his position in society and he would have to place himself under lock and key or hire a bodyguard if he expected to live long. As to them, his policy is undoubtedly sound, but he did not distinguish between such people and the alcoholic. This is as it should be. (10) Softcover Study Editions Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book First 164 (NEW) $ 105.00 $ 85.00. There may be some wrongs we can never fully right. There should be no undue haste for the couple to get far in any direction if he will and... 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